Next Wednesday Meara will have a cranioplasty to repair her skull. She has missing pockets in her skull due to the hydrocephalus that was incurred from her last brain surgery.
Because her skull is vulnerable we don’t have a choice in this surgery. The longer we wait to do this the higher risk of damaging her skull from a simple accident, fall, etc.
When the surgeon is finished placing the implant called medpor, the plastic surgeon will then remove as much of the existing scar tissue as possible and pull her scalp closer together. She will still have a scar but hopefully it will be smaller and less noticeable. For Megan and I it is her battle scar. A story of where she has been and what she continues to fight every single night. For Meara, an almost eleven year old, this gives her a chance going into middle school to feel like a normal child. Which she isn’t. She is not normal. She is a warrior.
Going through the process of the VNS surgery in April was a good reminder for Megan and I. How to handle the waiting room. How to handle the recovery. How to help Meara manage the pain.
When you think of a surgeon opening up your child’s skull it’s surreal. Something that no parent wants to go through.
But this isn’t about me or Megan. It’s about Meara. It’s about making her stronger. As if she hasn’t proved her strength, resilience, and determination over and over again.
This is about healing. Meara continues to have seizures every night. Megan and I do not get proper sleep. But we continue. We continue because our daughter is stronger than epilepsy. She is a warrior. And because if she can get up and take on the day then we can too.
The ocean knows how to heal. If we continue to let the ocean heal it will. I believe that for ourselves. Some things last. Like love. If Megan and I love each other. If we love our children. If we love others. We will heal. And so will Meara. That is, hear me, that is...the only thing that will heal. Love. If we let it. If we let love takes its place, and let it do its work. We will all heal.
